Old People

If a 16 year old cannot be trusted to vote on the basis of their underdevelopment and lack of common sense, then why should a 83 year decrepit individual be trusted to determine a future they will not live to see? I will concede that most of said individuals are probably withering away in a nursing home, and voting is not as much of a concern as living to the next day; however, necessary precautions must be put in place to prevent jeopardizing the future of young people. One time, an old person genuinely asked me what’s wrong with the Klu Klux Klan and with that I rest my case.

Young People

As I was aimlessly scrolling through twitter, as a young person does, I stumbled upon the disturbing and intriguing image of young people shoving spoonfuls full of cinnamon into their mouth for no other reason than to cough. My United States history teacher, Leslie Ringle, once said, “Your generation is going to be the one that influences and changes the world.” AND THAT’S TERRIFYING. I don’t trust my peers to make decisions about their lunch, let alone anything regarding the fate of this country. It’s unsettling to think that soon the vote will be in the hands of young people, when harming themselves in increasingly creative ways seems to be Gen Z’s favorite past time. I mean salt and ice? C’mon guys.

Babies

Do I really have to explain this one?

Everyone In Between

Based on the outcome of our most recent political climate, it is evident that all citizens of the United States cannot be trusted to vote. According to a national survey conducted by Xavier University’s Center for the Study of the American Dream, one in three natural-born citizens failed to pass the civics portion of a common naturalization test. In order to pass this test, applicants must answer six out of ten questions correct from a range of topics. It is estimated that if the standard were raised to seven out of ten answers being correct, then nearly half of the individuals who participated in the survey would fail. However, there is a 97.5 percent passing rate by immigrants who took the same test. Granted, access to education can impact how one would score on such a test, but that’s a class issue and we don’t talk about that in America. The point I’m trying to make is that residents of America shouldn’t be trusted to vote on their future. Because at this point it’s pretty clear they don’t care about it.

Also people who drive Hummers. It’s just not fuel efficient, man, there’s a reason they don’t make them anymore.